It’s the conversation you never want to have with your partner – if we die, who will look after the kids?? Who do we trust??
This impossible conversation took place in my house straight after the birth of our son. My husband did what 95% of people do….ignored the decision in the hope it would go away. I hounded him for weeks and FINALLY got the message through to him that it was a conversation we needed to have.
It’s the impossible decision though, isn’t it? How can you pick someone good enough to raise your children that isn’t you? No one is good enough. No one will do it right. And it opens your mind to the fact that we’re mortal, and some day something may happen to us that will remove our right to watch our children grow up. Depressing, isn’t it.
The only thing more depresing is the thought that you might not even get a say in who will take over those day to day duties of kid wrangling if you don’t have a Will that specifies your wishes.
How many times have I heard the words “Oh, we couldn’t chose anyone, no one seemed right, it just caused arguments between us, so we haven’t bothered yet”. These words terrify me to my core. I know how hard this decision is, I know how hard it is to look among family and friends and find the “perfect fit” for your kids – I’ve had to do it myself so I really do understand!
But if you don’t make a decision and something does happen to you, you won’t be around to have your say. Is it REALLY easier to back away from the conversation because it’s “too hard”? You risk that your kids will be stuck in limbo because you didn’t appoint guardians for them.
In all honestly, it’s unlikely that anything will happen to you and your partner, so it may never be a problem. But unlikely isn’t 100%. It’s a conversation and a piece of paper. Please think about it.
Shannon Bennett
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